Sometimes, I look at all the cooking around me and think that Indian women only seem to be born to cook at home! (face palm!) Of course, many of them enjoy it and do it with a happy heart, but I don’t know if cooking the entire day from breakfast to night for all meals in a day is really a good thing to ask anybody to do.
Right from making tea/coffee/any other hot beverage to breakfast, to lunch to evening tea/snacks to dinner a woman is the “Annapoorani” (yes, it does sound nice if said that way) of any family. She not only has to make the food but has to make sure that everybody has eaten well as well. She has to check the nutritional quotient of the food and has to make sure that the food is also tasty. And to the many other worries, Instagram reels from food influencers also make cooking looking so easy and glamorous! (It is not…I tell you…:))
Many girls might resist it at first but might just get used to it as a way of life. In bigger cities, cooks are available who can ease the cooking burden on the women. But I am not sure whether this convenience is available in smaller cities.
I think the best way to deal with this is to make sure that cooking becomes a gender agnostic activity and both men and women in India learn to cook. I think in many other countries cooking is not considered so much a women’s job as it is in India. If both the man and woman can share the kitchen workspace, there will be mutual respect for all. Cooking will not be looked down by anybody and it is nice to share responsibilities for the different chores in the kitchen. One can cut the vegetables, while the person can grind if anything needs grinding. Then, each person can keep one dish on the stove and complete the dish. Similarly, one person can make a beverage(tea/coffee) for one set of people while another person can make a beverage for another set of people. Sure, the kitchen will need more organization with many people there, but with time, it will be more streamlined and it might actually be an enjoyable process.
We cannot change the past generations but we can at least educate the next generation of kids to shoulder equal responsibility in the kitchen.
What are your thoughts on cooking becoming a gender agnostic activity? Will it work?
This post is for BlogchatterA2Z 2025!
Glad finally I found a post that resonates my views. It looks strange my mother learnt cooking after marriage and my father who taught her. I always felt my father was best cook. I used to see his face when visitors appreciated my mother’s cooking skills. Avakaya pickle it’s always my father who made. My family irrespective of gender taught cooking and house chores. Thank you for writing. Learning chores helped my brother and me during away from home for professional reasons. I still do all my chores.
Nice…
Nowadays the attitude is changing, I guess. When I ask my students, I find so many boys who love cooking.
That is nice… it is doing it daily, morning, noon and night that makes it a grind… but I am sure women will welcome any help that is given! 🙂
My friend, you’ve become a bit old school! I have a feeling that, in the next generation, guys will get a girlfriend if they know cooking. 🙂
I read through the comments, especially your reply to @Matheikal. Cooking 3 times/day really is tough. I tried it for two weeks when my mom was staying with me. Balancing work, cleaning, cooking, coffeeing, and then walking—it’s not easy at all, I was as fast as Jackie Chan!!
I honestly don’t know how Indian women, especially those who work, manage everything. I guess I’ve become old school myself after living away from our wonderful homeland for over a decade, and now people laugh at my old-fashioned views. They say many families have maids, use home kitchen services, or just eat out now, especially in cities. I’m not sure how it is in smaller towns.
Recently, I visited the Indian International School here and noticed that both boys and girls participate in kitchen ECA. So things are changing, which is good to see. Even though I don’t cook regularly, I support your point of view. There are a few dishes I can make pretty well, thanks to my M and W at home and YouTube!
Your post was heartfelt and beautifully written. Wishing you all the best!
Bigger cities are good…we have so much of help…but smaller cities is a struggle, I think…after a while it just becomes a way of life for many, no questions asked…